Doug Tales 1: “Now You Understand How I Feel”

This blog post is the start of us sharing here—now and then—some of Doug Mendenhall’s tales for those who haven’t heard them before, and to remind those who have.

Doug shared many personal experiences in his books. These true stories illustrate what he was learning at the time about God, himself, and the process of conquering spiritual evil throughout this life. While most of what Doug shares in his writings involves himself in some way, many experiences come from others’ lives that interact with his.

The following set of events in Taylorsville, Utah, is covered on pages 21-26 of Doug’s first book, My Peace I Give Unto You. (2001.) Most of My Peace I Give Unto You shares what happened when Doug’s ten-year-old daughter, Denise, had a near-death experience in November 1999. But even before her NDE and its aftermath, Doug was being taught spiritual principles, as illustrated in these events six months before:

“Thanks for letting me use the van,” I said to Sarah, as I handed over the keys.

“Any time, Doug,” she smiled back at me. “You didn’t need to wash it, you know.”

“I know, but it’s the least I can do,” I answered.

Sarah and her roommate Erin are my neighbors and wonderful friends besides. Since I lost my job, they’d been extremely generous, offering their van from time to time when our family needed a larger vehicle….

“Hey, Doug, sit down, I want to tell you a story.” Sarah quickly changed subjects. “Do you have a minute?”

“Sure, no problem. Time’s the one thing I’ve got a lot of lately,” I quipped, as we settled into her porch chairs.


It was that time between sunset and night where all things take on a surreal lavender hue. At the crosswalk, an old woman stopped, in part to eye the traffic, in part to rest.

“Offer her a ride.”

“Huh?” Sarah frowned. She braked slowly and the car coasted toward the intersection ahead. The short pause there allowed her and Erin to glance over at the old woman.

Offer her a ride, came the thought a second time as their car moved forward through the light.

Erin turned to Sarah. “I think you should turn around. I don’t know why, but we need to offer her a ride.”

“Yeah, I was thinking the same thing.” Sarah quickly turned the car around and headed back toward the intersection and the old woman. Once again turning, she drew up beside her on the curb and Erin rolled down the window.

“Ma’am, would you let us give you a ride?”

Shock, surprise and finally acceptance played out in turn on the old woman’s face.


She placed her bag on the sidewalk and opened the back door of the car. “Now honey, be careful as you pick up my bag. Don’t drop anything!” She climbed into the car.

Erin glanced back at Sarah, shrugged, and got out of the car to pick up the woman’s bag.

“Honey, turn left here and go down to the store at the corner of Waterton and 3rd. I need to get my prescription.” She promptly settled back into the seat and closed her eyes.

They looked at each other in confusion, offering no comments or questions. Within minutes the car pulled up to the main door of the corner market.

“Okay, this will only take a minute.” The old women came alive and worked her way out of the car and into the store.

Once again Sarah and Erin looked at each other, too stunned to speak. The brazen confidence, the arrogance of the old woman, had momentarily robbed them of their voices. Minutes later they saw her coming from the store.

“425 Washington, honey.”

The request—no, command—came as the old woman opened the car door and climbed back in.

“Okay . . . uh . . . that’s 425 Washington,” Sarah repeated, and shifted the car into gear. The short trip passed in silence until the old woman’s house came into view.

“The brick one, there, with the lilac bush in front. Just pull into the driveway. And you can bring the bag into the house for me.”

Sarah parked as instructed. Erin got out and followed the old woman through the front door, laden with her bag.

“Set it down here, honey.” The old woman pointed to a clear spot on the table. “And close the door tightly on your way out.” Then she disappeared into a nearby room.

Erin left, making sure the door was tightly closed and got back into the car. Sarah backed out into the street. Heavy silence continued through the short trip home. Neither one wanted to break the silence for fear of what they might say.

Sarah hung the car keys on the peg inside the back door as Erin got a glass of water.


“She never even once said thank-you.” Finally, Sarah spoke. “I can’t believe she didn’t even say please.”

This seemed to thaw Erin. “We were supposed to help her, but I expected at least a thank-you. At least that would have taken the edge off her arrogant attitude.”

“I know,” said Sarah, warming to the conversation. “She just ordered us around. Can you believe it?”

“. . . why were we supposed to help her. . . ”

Erin opened her mouth to comment just as both of them felt, and heard, the soft, quiet voice.

“Now you understand how I feel.”

Their eyes dropped. In that moment, love filled the room.


Later that night, two very sincere and humble prayers of gratitude were softly spoken to Heaven for the lesson so poignantly learned—and for the mercy and the love so freely given.


I sat quietly as Sarah finished telling me her experience with the old woman. I was moved by her willingness to share the encounter.

“I don’t know why I told you that, Doug. When you handed me the van keys, I knew you needed to know.” Sarah sounded almost apologetic for sharing this private moment.

“Thank you, Sarah. What a neat lesson,” I replied, honestly sympathetic to her tender feelings.

“You know you can use the van anytime you need it,” she grinned….

For two days Sarah’s story nudged at me. I wanted to know more. I began looking through religious and self-help books for insights on thankfulness. “Gratitude” popped up as often as “thankfulness.” Were they the same? A lot of what I read suggested they were. Was gratitude somehow different, something more than thankfulness? Or did I just need it to be?

I opened a book of quotes to the section labeled “Gratitude.” I thumbed through it, stopping at a short passage by William Shakespeare:

I hate ingratitude in man more than lying, vainness, babbling, drunkenness, or any other taint or vice whose strong corruption inhabits our frail blood.

I read and re-read the passage. First to understand what Shakespeare was saying, then to let it seep into my mind. Finally I went on to another quote. As I finished reading that one, I found myself going back to Shakespeare. I read his words again.

“Who hates it?” the question escaped my lips. The obvious answer, “Shakespeare,” left me uneasy. I read another quote, then again returned to Shakespeare’s words.

“Who hates it?” The question came again, demanding, as I finished reading.

“I do.”

The thought burst through my mind, shattering the obvious, leaving me to grasp for what I felt to be true.

“Father in Heaven,” I whispered.

In deafening silence I sat reflecting on the gravity of ingratitude. My mind opened. Minutes later I thumbed through the book to another quote, by Joseph F. Smith:

The spirit of gratitude . . . begets love and friendship, and engenders divine influence.

The words whispered to me that gratitude was the beginning of a true friendship based in love.

“In gratitude will you find my love; in gratitude will you find me.”

The voice was soft and comforting, more felt than heard.

My heart sang out in joy. I understood! Gratitude is the door He stands at—the door He waits for us to open! Gratitude for all that is within our lives.

I closed the book of quotes, closed my eyes, and just felt. I was encircled by a comforting sensation. My heart slowed to the rhythmic pulsing I felt from everything around me. I knew I understood.

Next Steps/Looking Forward

Twenty-one years ago, Doug Mendenhall (1957-2020) was introduced to the metaphysical world as a result of his youngest daughter’s near-death experience and subsequent events. He learned up close and personal that much reality exists beyond our visible world. Then, around ten years ago, he was invited to join a work that was already in progress of the Savior Jesus Christ serving others in some specific ways. Doug agreed, and dedicated the last decade of his life to becoming aware, trained, and competent in bringing light and truth to others while fighting darkness on many levels.

This warrior mission—and Doug’s work of public relations about it—motivated him to write the book Conquering Spiritual Evil in 2011. He revised that book as a second edition in 2012, and then followed with three sequels on similar topics: I See…Awake! (2015), I See…Arise! (2016), and Conquering Spiritual Evil, Volume Two (2020). In addition, in March 2017 Doug started this blog as an extra way of spreading his knowledge of God’s work.

“Next Steps (Looking Forward)” is the title Doug gave to the last section of his final book, Conquering Spiritual Evil, Volume Two, published in August 2020. Doug was interested then in further sharing with others about the Savior’s work he is involved in.

We and others are continuing the Savior Jesus Christ’s work of conquering spiritual evil. We will post on this blog, as was done in the past, experiences and learning from such experiences in this work. Debi James (a daughter of Doug’s), Galen Fletcher (a man who knew Doug for eighteen years), and others, will share here periodically. We will look back with appreciation for Doug’s many contributions (and share some of his prior writings), and look forward with gratitude for the next steps and what is to come.

Thank you for joining us in learning about the Lord’s work of conquering spiritual evil.

Doug Mendenhall Memorial Recording

The funeral and interment services for Doug Mendenhall on December 29, 2020 were recorded and are now available online.

An audio recording of his funeral is at:

An audio recording of the graveside service is at:

We are thankful for those who participated in any way in the services for Doug—online or in-person—and those who made these recordings available.

The Mendenhall family

Personal Revelation

In May 2020, Doug Mendenhall posted a few blog posts which quoted from an earlier August 16, 2008 talk by Denver Snuffer. The topic of the 2008 talk, recorded by Doug twelve years ago in Sandy, Utah, is “Personal Revelation.”

The full two-hour talk is now available at the following links:


Edited transcript:

Doug was working to post this talk to his blog five months ago, and we’re grateful to make it available now.

Doug Mendenhall Passing

Hello friends. We are so sorry to have to let you know that Doug passed away last Friday evening. Thank you to all of his wonderful friends, he loved and appreciated each of you. His viewing and funeral information will be posted here….

Thank you,

His family


We have written about working a restaurant in Fairview, Utah from July 2006 to July 2008 before in our books and on this blog. No one was paid, it was all labor given to Him.

There were many lessons learned from this experience, hard and also wonderful lessons.

The one thing we didn’t know about was that there had been a “negotiation” with the Savior about opening the restaurant and working it before we came to this mortality.

Maybe I should say a covenant was made. We obeyed the covenant and the Lord Jesus Christ came to the restaurant with His wife, Mary.

It makes me wonder how many of us made similar covenants with Him before coming here. It could have been something as simple as giving money to a beggar, which He was playing the part of.

Wow, it could be thousands of different things. Are we open to this kind of opportunity? Would we actually believe if it did happen? No, how about when it happens?

I know that for months after, people would eat their meal in that booth and then not leave. They’d just sit there. For hours sometimes. We’ve discussed “morphic resonance” in one of our books. Is that what it was? Is that why people are drawn to the Sacred Grove? To Johnson’s Farm in Kirtland? Interesting questions.

My question is, if the Lord Jesus Christ came and told one of something He wanted done, and you didn’t know if He had made a covenant with you before mortality, would you be allowed to negotiate?

I mean, is it okay to negotiate with Him. I know my friend Snuffer does. There are times he even gets what he negotiated for. But he is an attorney and is well versed in negotiations.

Should that person call the Snuff and ask him to negotiate with the Savior for them?

Or just ride it out and see what happens. Because obviously nothing will happen unless they accomplish the “mission.”

It is the time of year when we would be preparing to feed fifty families a free meal at that restaurant. After the meal the children could go upstairs to the Christmas room and pick out a present for someone else. Then their parents went up there and picked out presents for their children and themselves.

It was very hard work. We wouldn’t get home until about 1 AM and then do it all over again the next day. We also did a live Nativity outside where a manger scene had been built. Friends and workers from the restaurant had sewed costumes for people to play the parts of Mary, Joseph, Angels, Wise Men, and Shepherds. It was beyond cool. One couple even put their own baby in the manger for a few minutes.

The following Thanksgiving was when They came to the restaurant.

So if one was to receive a “download” from the Lord Jesus Christ about doing a project, and that person understands that He would make it no small project, would it be okay to negotiate with Him about certain things that you might desire if the project was actually done.

Based on the Snuffer example He is open to this.

I wonder what this person should negotiate for. Are there some “rewards” that are better than others. Or is that according to the individual. For example the three Nephites thought the reward of staying and doing His work as translated beings was better than what the other nine wanted, to be with Him in His Kingdom immediately upon transitioning.

I know what I would tell this person. Just wondering if you would have similar ideas.

Really interesting proposition, isn’t it.

God bless.

Joyful Days

There are some days that are so joyful it is hard to define. I just wish they came more often, though if journaled it can be relived and brought back to our memory over and over again.

Joseph Smith taught the Nauvoo Relief Society in a meeting on April 28, 1842, instructions about women giving healing blessings: “Respecting the female laying on hands, he further remark’d, there could be no devil in it if God gave his sanction by healing – that there could be no more sin in any female laying hands on the sick than in wetting the face with water – that it is no sin for any body to do it that has faith, or if the sick has faith to be heal’d by the administration.” (The First Fifty Years of the Relief Society, 55)

We wrote a long time ago about our youngest son being sick with a very bad earache. I was on the road and my wife was home alone with him. We had just moved to this city and she wasn’t comfortable with the local church leadership. I didn’t know what to tell her to do.

I called the next morning and asked how he was. She told me he was just fine. This really made me wonder so I asked her how that came about.

“I laid my hands on him and in the name of Jesus Christ blessed him. Then the earache went away,” she told me. God bless my wife and her faith!

Eliza R. Snow who was the Relief Society general president made the following statement in 1883 in reference to women giving healing blessings:

“Women can administer in the name of JESUS, but not by virtue of the Priesthood.”

I have come to know that worthy men and women can have priesthood. There is also “church” priesthood which we wrote about in the newest Conquering Spiritual Evil Vol. 2 book. I’m not discussing that here. Here I only want to acknowledge that true priesthood (Aaronic or Melchizedek) for men mainly gives them the right to voice or perform ordinances. True priesthood for women comes to them when they give birth or is otherwise activated by God. Theirs is to nurture and bless children unto God, for they (children) are truly Theirs (Mother and Father), not ours.

My wife had the right to lay hands on our son and bless him. She didn’t have to declare any priesthood—though she does have women’s priesthood—her faith in our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ was sufficient.

Yesterday I had watched a short video put out by a local church. As I watched it I was hit in the head with some very negative energy and had an instant headache that would not go away. I have been around these things for some twenty years and know when I get hit with negative entities, weapons, or devices. I had been attacked.

Today we did a generational healing for a young woman. In the past those attending were just my sighted friend, a recorder, and myself. Now days we have other people, mainly women because of their empathic abilities, come and help us out. There were nine of those helping today. (If you want to know more about this kind of healing, it is covered extensively in the new book mentioned above.)

As the work was ending I realized that I still had this “thing” that had hit me in the head. I knew with the holidays coming it might be hard to get a group of my men friends over to clear me of it.

I sat there in the middle of nine women and my sighted friend wondering what to do. The above references to Eliza R. Snow and Joseph Smith came to mind. So I asked:

“Lord Jesus Christ, would it be okay or Thy will that I ask these women to voice a healing blessing on me?”

The answer, “Yes.”

I asked them if they would. I had a feeling this was something they had never done before since most of them came from the same local religion and in that arena something like this is now strictly verboten. Some things run deep, especially religious mind control and habits.

I was pleasantly surprised they all agreed and was quickly surrounded. I was told which one to ask to voice the healing blessing. She didn’t hesitate a second. It was funny as they put their hands on my head they about broke my neck. I kindly asked them to take some of the load off. They did.

The healing blessing was voiced in the name of Jesus Christ and I felt Him take the offending darkness away.

Later I would ask my sighted friend if there had been a huge amount of light coming from that circle of Christ centered, faith driven, women.

“Oh yes,” was the answer. There was much light there. The Savior heard them and answered their healing petition.

Praise God. Praise the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I thank Them for faith based, Christ centered women that are not afraid of what others, especially men, women, and religious leaders might think. They are increasing their talents, gifts, and abilities by serving Him in all things.  Six of the nine are married.  What a blessing they are to their husbands.  Three are single.  What a blessing they will be to their future husbands.  Though many religious based single men will probably be afraid of such women.  Women that know their Savior and are not afraid to do His will.

I am grateful for my wife, that seventeen years ago was not afraid of what “religious” men might think and did what the Lord Jesus Christ told her to do, thereby helping our son in his need.

May He bless you all with such women in your world.

God bless.

Right or Left?

It is my opinion that there is no right and left in our nation any longer.  There is only good and evil.

If you are burning down cities, towns, buildings, cars, or others property, you are evil.  If you are killing, hurting others, or only maiming them, you are evil.  I don’t care if you are possessed or not, you are evil.

 Yesterday, a “dark skinned man” shots two cops in California.  They were taken to the hospital and are in serious condition when the “peaceful protestors” show up to shut down the hospital to block the entrances and exits.  They are pretty much stopped so they start yelling to the cops, “We hope you die.”   

Some of you won’t like that I write this, that it isn’t nice.  I said I’m going to call out evil for what it is.  And yes, evil isn’t nice.  Do you want to tell me of a time when it is?

There is a communist insurrection going on in this country.  I told you the three women founders of BLM are avowed communists.  Is that why when you watch the videos BLM chanting, “Death to the USA?”  The rich sent their little boys and girls to Ivy League schools to be trained by their communist professors.

No?  What about the professor back east that stated the man who was shot in the chest and died in Portland was a Trump supporter and therefore was a fascist, so he was happy the man was killed.  Then because he put Trump supporters in a subhuman category, he declared that all fascists (Trump supporters) should be murdered.

Isn’t it interesting that in Nazi Germany the fascists declared that the Jews were “subhuman” and they killed them.  Now these supposed humans are declaring that if you have opposing views, you are a fascist and need to be taken out or murdered.

If any of this offends, good.  I’m tired of trying to not offend by ignoring evil.  So in the words of Mark Passio, “Get as offended as you like.”

Now we have Netflix putting out child pornography in their movie “Cuties.”  Or should I say pedophilia.  That movie premiered last year right here in Utah at Sundance.  I’m sure those of the Hollywood pedo ilk loved it.  That same year, Variety reported Sterling Van Wagenen, who co-founded the Sundcance Film Festival with Robert Redford, was sentenced to at least six years in prison after pleading guilty to sexual abuse of a child that began when the child was 7 years old.

So how many of us are supporting Netflix, that purveyor of child porn, transgender porn and outright porn by subscribing to their service?  Oops, did that offend?  Good.

Or we have actress, Blake Lively, that came out at an awards event talking about child rape and how prevalent it is.  She said she asked a law officer that deals with this kind of thing how young are the young kids he’s seeing?  He said, “They are infants.”  She kind of broke down and said that she had a six month old and asked, “What does that mean, what does an infant mean?” 

“He said, the umbilical cord is still attached.”

Child rape is evil beyond anything I could ever consider.  Except when I realize that these people don’t stop there.  The babies she is talking about come from what they call “breeders.”  I interviewed a woman three times back in 2002 that was born into this.  When she became of childbearing age she became a breeder. They would take the child in a dark occult ritual.  Then the child is traumatized, tortured, and then sacrificed.  Its blood which is full of adrenalin at that point is consumed along with its flesh as a sacrament to that dark evil thing they worship as a god.

How dare I discuss such things?  It is right in front of your face all the time now.  It is part of their mind control to desensitize you to the horrors and make you accepting of it.  The following story is quite offensive, isn’t it?  The demonic human raped a six month old and put it on the internet.  May he rot in hell.  Oh, I’m sure they are getting his cage ready right now……

Is the pedophilia a precursor to all of this?  What about the blood lust we are seeing materialize with the “peaceful protestors?”  Is that also evil?

Why are so many of the so called “elites” involved in these things?  They always have been, since the time of Cain.  Who, by the way, still resides here on this planet and is still teaching his and his god’s followers how all of this works so they can gain what they perceive to be power.  They don’t realize their god will never give them any of his power.  They may suck a human being empty of its life force, get an adrenochrome fix, or fulfill the blood lust they got from their god, but it is all fleeting.  Fleeting until, like a drug addict, they can get their next fix.

Is that why someone reported from Richfield, Utah how a woman was followed around Wal-Mart by six men.  She left the store and they followed her out to her car. When she got in they got in their car to follow her.  She got away.  What was that about?  Could it be her two little children that were with her?  Apparently they are worth a lot of money in the child trafficking market.  I told you all of these things will be coming to your doorstep.

God is allowing the fruit of evil to be judged in real time.  Is God really allowing this?  Why?  Maybe He is putting it right in front of our faces so we can judge what is good and what is of evil.  What is your choice?

“And if the time comes that the voice of the people doth choose iniquity, then is the time that the judgments of God will come upon you; yea, then is the time he will visit you with great destruction even as he has hitherto visited this land.”  (Mosiah 29:27)

There is no better time to turn to Him than now, not part time either.  Not with a pretty face that we put forward for others to see.  “Look how good I am!  I don’t support any of those things.  Well except the child porn streaming channel, Netflix…..”

Does that matter?  Can we have one foot in each camp?  Or has the chasm become so great it is past time to choose, do we want to be part of all that is good or with what is evil.  Do we choose to support evil, mentally, spiritually, physically, with our time or with our money?

Might be time to choose, that is why I don’t feel there is any right or left anymore.  What are the people of the United States choosing?  What will the result be?  Is it okay to ignore those facts and what the Lord God, Jesus Christ, plainly says in the above scripture?

There is only Good or evil.  And we know where each comes from. 

It is my prayer that we look at all things with much understanding and that we then choose wisely.

“And it if seem evil unto you to serve the Lord, choose you this day whom ye will serve; whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the flood, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land ye dwell: but as for  me and my house, we will serve the Lord.”  (Joshua 24:15)

God bless.


Cords and bonds have been written about on this site and in the books.

Today some wonderful women came by for some work. I ended up working on cutting cords and bonds. Doing this reminded me of something about bonds that I don’t know if we’ve discussed before. If we have, then you get the same refresher I got this morning along with some added information. Remember cords go one way while bonds go both directions.

There have been more than a few people that have had bonds removed from them that came from people that were causing them problems. In other words, there are beneficial bonds and not so beneficial bonds.

A great example of a beneficial bond would be between a husband and spouse. My sighted daughter talked about this extensively in her book, In His Arms. Pretty cool chapter. Siblings can have bonds, good and bad, between them. There are bonds of light, martial, emotional, mental, satanic, and good and not so good bonds for starters. These can go between husband and wife, you and your friends, coworkers, and anyone else for that matter.

I’ll let you figure out what a bad bond would be. Just let your imagination run and you will probably be right.

Bonds usually start as an attachment, as stated above through marital, emotional, mental, or satanic issues. The longer the attachment stays and integrates then the bond forms and will grow stronger. It can actually become part of your personality over time. Once integrated the other side can share thoughts with you, so you then think those thoughts come from your mind. They don’t.

Some bonds form what looks like a T. The top part would go from one mortal to another, while the vertical part would be going to Hell. Pretty cool, huh. A three-way connection between you and another mortal and Hell, a “Hell-bond”.

That way Hell can siphon energy from both parties and also give you some “hell juice”, whatever that is. (I made up the “hell juice” part.) It can be whatever Hell decides to send to you through that conduit.

Are dark or negative bonds important to get rid of? Absolutely, otherwise after integration they become part of you. They can become what you’d call your friend, since you can begin to enjoy their companionship and what you get from the other end. If this is a good bond from the Lord Jesus Christ it can be very beneficial. Think of a bond between a mother and child, a husband and wife, or the best one, between you and the Lord Jesus Christ.

But remember, if this isn’t a good bond, the other end is probably quite dark and will not have your best interest at heart. A bond between you and Hell would not be beneficial to you or your soul. A bond between you and an “old flame” from high school or college wouldn’t be to your best interest, would it?

Comprehending this could be important. One path to disease starts with the emotion of anger, which brings entities and attachments. The attachments can facilitate a bond at that location and the bond can then bring in disease.

The disease can be fast moving or slow, depending on the strength of the entities that come. Though the length of a disease can be made to last longer if the entities want to or are assigned to cause torture to the mortal host.

There are some diseases people elect to experience either before birth or after. It might be well to know if a disease is caused by evil entities, a test you chose to experience, or is a lack of wisdom and bad choices. The latter diseases would be from the consequences of those bad choices and lack of wisdom.

Not all diseases are caused by evil entities. Some debilitating circumstances are short-lived and others are long. An amazing amount is dependent upon strength of character as well as the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual strengths. In all life’s trials and tribulations we must look to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, in gratitude. With His help we will know how to deal with either that which we elected or what life brings.

Either way, as stated, it is always desirable to come unto the Lord Jesus Christ and get rid of those negative bonds and cords.

Remember in John 14:6 He told us:

“Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.”

He is the way, truth, and light and has paid four our errors, lack of understanding and wisdom, sins and all else negative. He is the Healer, He knows how to succor us because he descended below all things in order to comprehend it all. It wasn’t just book learning or watching others, He descended below it all, it was experiential. How else would one know how to overcome it, if it wasn’t experiential, if you haven’t experienced it?

“And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people. And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities.” (Alma 7:11-12, emphasis added)

God bless.

Cherished Outcome

I had a very good friend come over yesterday. I hadn’t seen him in a while, so it was a very pleasant 150 minutes together.

We both have daughters that are very gifted, which is a great thing and a very hard thing. We discussed much. Unfortunately, much of it is our private conversation and will most likely not make it here. Fortunately, there are concepts that we discussed that we can talk about here. Well, that along with other life experiences the Savior has “blessed” me with. I say blessed because sometimes while going through what is brought into our lives it doesn’t seem or feel like a blessing. It is later that we look at the big picture and see how it all fits together and that honestly, it was a blessing.

Several months ago a husband and wife came here to “vet” me and what we do. We spent a good two hours together. My impression was they were a really good couple, full of love for each other and their family. She was suffering from an illness. They had told me this before they came and I asked the Savior if she was “appointed unto death.”  The answer was “no.”

“And again, it shall come to pass that he that hath faith in me to be healed, and is not appointed unto death, shall be healed.” (D&C 42:48)

We’ve discussed this before here, but it needs to be mentioned again. The woman texted me asking us to come because she wanted a blessing. Several weeks later we found ourselves at their home. We took two couples to help with the portalcism on their property and home along with what we have come to call a counselor. The counselor has always been a woman that is well versed in what we do. She is there to answer any questions and make sure the family doesn’t bother us while we work. If they are looking out the window and focusing on my sighted friend it messes up her energy and focus.

The morning before we left I asked again if she was appointed unto death and the answer came back in the middle, it was not a “no” this time, but it wasn’t a “yes” either. Praise God I said.

After we had cleared the property and home I explained what the clearing/blessing on her would entail. I told her about asking the Savior if she was appointed unto death and how the answer turned out. My sighted friend said that without the blessing she would transition in two days. I believed that because of how frail the woman looked. She also said that the blessing would give her another two weeks to decide what she wanted to do, stay or go home.

My cherished outcome was the Lord Jesus Christ would heal her, a huge miracle would be declared and she’d live another hundred years with her wonderful husband and children. We’d seen these things before and I just knew. I had laid hands on people’s head before and felt His power surging through my hands. I just knew this would be another time He’d pull through for this family and me.

Did I really know? Not at all. I had a cherished outcome and therefore really couldn’t receive what the Savior wanted me to know because I already knew. In other words, my own desires or will got muddled in my mind and I decided the Lord God would do my will.

Can you believe that? After all this time I still get “muddled” and want my will to be done, forgetting it is always about His will.

This woman transitioned 15 days after the clearing/blessing. I have talked to her and she is happy where she is and is planning to work hard helping her family to get to Him, the Lord Jesus Christ and joining her many mortal years from now. It was her will or desire to transition. What a blessing she is to her husband and children. I pray the Lord Jesus Christ will give them comfort and peace. My sighted friend would later tell me that we did exactly what the Lord Jesus Christ wanted us to do in relation to this woman. Parise God.

Nearly twenty years ago my own daughter lay in the ICU of Primary Children’s Hospital. We were told she would transition within twenty-four hours. I went to back of the hospital to pray. Actually I went there to rail on God about my daughter transitioning. I had my cherished outcome that a miracle would ensue and she’d leave the hospital whole and completely recovered. The stroke that had completely destroyed her left brain would disappear and all the tissue would come back healthy. Just a minor miracle for You Lord I told myself.

She did live, but it has been a hard struggle for her and us ever since. She did come home spiritually sighted. Some days we wondered if spiritual sight was a gift as some call it or a curse. Her “healing” didn’t happen until I let go of my cherished outcome and gave gratitude and praise to my Father in Heaven for her and her life. I gave thanks for her life and then her death, telling Father that it was His will that needed to be done, not mine. I gave thanks for the ten years we had with her. All of this expressed gratitude from the heart opened the door for the Savior to do what His will was, not mine.

Recently, a friend called and asked if I’d help voice a blessing to her husband. I asked and received a yes, so I prepared myself. When I got there another friend that they had called was also there. We chatted for a while and then laid hands on the man’s head and voiced the blessing. The Savior cleared him of all spiritual weapons and entities, plus all else that need to be taken off his body. I don’t remember much else that was said.

After I got home my sighted friend called me and asked about what had happened. She ended up going to the couple’s home and he ended up in the hospital getting the needed medication to take care of the physical side of things.

Once again it was my cherished outcome that got in the way. I wanted my good friend healed. Wouldn’t you? How about your daughter? Or a woman that is still young and needed by her family? All cherished outcomes.

I have found that God doesn’t do cherished outcomes. It is about His will which is the Father’s will. He sees the big picture and knows what is best for each of us.

Even then I challenged my sighted friend about this. (Some days my soul just needs to be shaken and told how it is, so I challenge.) I told her that if the Savior had been here doing His mortal mission during these events, they’d all have been healed. “Just read the Bible,” I told her, “He healed everybody!”

There are times when I make statements like this that I realize that I’m about to be “schooled” or educated about my false ideas or misconceptions. Especially in relation to the Lord Jesus Christ.

I was told that He didn’t heal everyone. There were many He couldn’t heal due to lack of faith. (Didn’t he tell the Nephites this?) Others He couldn’t heal because they had to experience the effects of their causes, or the consequences of their actions. Meaning natural law declared they needed to pay for what they had done. She said my one friend that ended up in the hospital that night was paying physically for the way he had treated his body during his mortal life to that point. The foods he had eaten, the sugar, snacks, the lack of rest or however else he had treated his mortal flesh. Natural law declared a price has to be paid. Since that was the case there was nothing the Savior could do for him at that moment.

My sighted friend went on to explain that when Christ was mortal doing His mission, he met many that were doing the same thing, paying for how they had lived. He would tell them to repent, or change their habits and what to eat to help make their body healthy again. For most of these people He couldn’t do a thing but educate them.

I had just been educated. Do you think if I eat donuts and drink Coke for forty years, thereby developing massive health problems, I can just call on Him to deliver me from my own idiocy and heal me? The law of cause and effect states that for every action there is a reaction or a consequence. Even a cherished outcome on my behalf won’t work! Cherished outcomes don’t work. The effects in our lives will be determined by what we do. If you choose to stay up late playing video games with your children all the while knowing you need to get up early the next morning to get to work, how will your day at work be? Tired, groggy, messed up? You caused that effect/consequence and you will experience it to the fullest effect.

Remembering these experiences made me realize we block the Savior’s will by wanting our own will done, by having cherished outcomes, and by having the law of cause and effect kick in.

It should always be about His will. We have covered this before, but not in concert with cherished outcomes or needing to “suffer” for our choices. If someone calls asking for help, it might be important to ask Him about the situation. Is the person appointed unto death? Do they want to transition? If so, then there is nothing you can do. Do you have any cherished outcomes? If so, will the Lord’s process get muddled up? Is the person suffering for what they brought on themselves and the Lord’s hands are tied, so to speak? Did they come to mortality to have the experience they are now going through? Will you or can you mess it up with your own desires or will? The November 11, 2019 post talked about many of these things in a different light. Might be good to review it. It is called, Is This What PTSD Feels Like?

There is much to consider when we get involved doing His work. Is it important that we get out of the way and do what He wants us to do in the moment for that particular person? I am repenting of cherished outcomes, of thinking the Lord Christ can heal everyone and that nothing can get in His way. Are there times He can supersede natural law? Yes, but that is another discussion.

Part of what my friend and I discussed yesterday was how the Savior sees the “big” picture. He sees all the ramifications and knows what is best for each of us. Might it be important to defer to Him?

All honor, praise, and glory to Him and to our Parents. How this world presents itself to us is amazing, allowing us to learn cause and effect/consequence, learn how important it is to follow Their will and not ours, and to not have cherished outcomes. Doing all of this brings us closer to Them, we become more like Them.

Doing this, putting ourselves in Their shoes, seeing things from the spiritual like They do, helps us to not just understand things, but to comprehend them. Comprehension is so much more valuable than understanding. It’s understanding at a whole new level, don’t you think? Understanding is a male virtue, while the female opposite of understanding is wisdom. Putting these two together in balance brings knowledge or comprehension, which is a much more valuable tool. This helps us become like our Parents and Savior. They walk in balance between understanding and wisdom and therefore comprehend all things. May we do the same. One way to do so is to get rid of our cherished outcomes and view all from Their point of view, spiritually.

God bless.