Is this what PTSD feels like?

I am not making light of PTSD or anything like it. It is real and I found some of it on me. (That is how I choose to look at it.) I wish it was like that and I could just flick it off. It doesn’t seem to work that way.

There are times when an event or events make a profound impact on your psyche, spirit, and even body. I asked a former Marine if he understood that concept. He told me that after deployment overseas there is a very great urge to kiss the ground once you land back in the USA. I remember feeling that way when I landed in the United States after being in Spain for two years back in 1978. I just didn’t think a Marine would want to kiss anything but his wife and rifle.

We tried to help some friends with their child several months ago. It didn’t end well as their child didn’t want to give up the demon in it. The events so affected the three of us on the trip that we couldn’t drive the 11 hour trip home. We stopped at a hotel after three hours and crashed. The next day I was told by the Spirit to “play” tourist on the way home. Doing that did help our minds and spirit. Our bodies, not so much.

It was hard because of our love for these people and the trauma endured. I still love them and pray for them all the time.

So when we had another family call for help for their child and we knew it was an extreme possession issue I hoped and prayed that it would turn out how the family wanted it to. Not that any of us had a cherished outcome, it is always paramount that we realize and know it is the will of the Lord Jesus Christ, not ours. But hey, we can pray and send love, can’t we?

I have come to realize that, yes, possession is made easier through the use of alcohol and drugs. There is another problem that many have not considered. After being around gifted individuals for twenty years now, I have a small inkling of how hard it is for them. Often we have told the story of the woman that wanted to see through the veil and prayed for over twenty years for this gift. After all those years of praying, the Lord Jesus Christ granted her the gift of spiritual sight. The only problem is she just didn’t see the “light.” She saw all the dark that is around us, on us, and in us. It was more than she wanted to know or see. So since then she has prayed for the gift to go away.

My point is, there are sighted people that have a real hard time with the gift. Like the one woman that told me while in high school when she was dating she could hear all the thoughts of the boys that took her out. I guess many dates ended early. You know, hormones and such. Some of the sighted will get to the point that they will try many things to dull or take away what they see, hear, smell, and experience of the spirit realm. If is just too hard. We, the less sighted, might have a hard time understanding that. I know this to be true from all those that have told me how “lucky [my] daughter is, being sighted and able to see spiritually.” My sighted friend has been told many people have told her the same thing. I wonder if they would say the same thing if they were able to have her experiences of being take to hell and tortured as a child. Fun stuff, huh. Not in the least.

So the other day after this one family called for help, another one did the same. Since it was considered an emergency we agreed to do the two on the same day. Wow, I wondered, how will we ever get through two in one day, having the one from months ago still real fresh in my heart? I say heart, because that is where it is, in my heart memory.

The first didn’t end well. The young man didn’t want the entity inside of him to go. It is interesting how when we get entities on us, our mind can become quite clouded and we cease to think clearly. The entities can even make us believe they are our friends. The Savior got rid of the very large one on the outside. After doing that we started to cast out what was on the inside, but he bolted from the chair. His aunt told me today that he kept trying to get me to say the closing words by repeating, “In the name of. In the name of.” The entity wouldn’t allow him to say the Savior’s name, “even in sheer desperation for it to end.”

Like the one from months ago, if the person doesn’t want the entity to leave, there isn’t a thing the Lord Jesus Christ can do. He honors our will. He must and did walk away.

That was my life impacting realization. He honors our will. No matter what. Did you get that, no matter what. Even with a mother with tears streaming down her face with love for her adult child, her baby. Even with a father begging the Lord Christ to do something, anything, crying out, “Why can’t Christ do something?!” I have empathic gifts and could feel his heart, his love for his child. He would have exchanged his life for the child. I was wanting to exchange mine. That was not the will of our Lord Jesus Christ.

In the end the Savior had to walk away. And so did we. As we did again yesterday. Their will be done. One day I pray these individuals will find Him. If not in this life, in the next mortality.

The Savior told His disciples when they couldn’t cast the demons from a young man that some require fasting and prayer. True. For that reason we always attend these fasting and praying for Him to be there and the outcome to be what He desires. We have seen miracles, which it always is when one is relieved of demonic burden. It truly is life changing. But, as stated, when the person doesn’t desire the entity to leave, there is nothing that can be done, not even He can do that. If our Lord Jesus Christ did go against a conscious adult’s agency He would cease to be God. As hard a burden as that is at times, it will not change, and it cannot change. Satan found that out and see where it got him.

I don’t know if any of these people turned to alcohol and drugs to dampen their gifts. It doesn’t matter. They are gifted and gifts are hard. I do not and will not judge them. I send them love and pray for them.

The third had a better outcome. He was older and has been through hell for years. He was ready for all to evil to be destroyed and taken off of him.

We did find a level 23 portal under his bed. He told us that when the entities started coming through the portal each night, his bed would shake. My sighted friend mentioned that was because of the pressure of them coming through the portal and hitting the bed. Then they would scratch, bite and hit his legs on the way past his bed.

Later I will share many of the lessons learned. For me, today is a day of prayer for those that are tortured by possession. They are already in hell while still being mortal. Some is not their fault and some is their fault. Bad choices, works, actions, and even thoughts have consequences. We will discuss this soon from a completely different angle I’m sure most have not contemplated. I had not.

We did come here to the lab to learn. To learn to be like Him, our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. It is hard. I have a feeling it also helps when we have each other to get through it.

I pray the Lord Jesus Christ and our Father will help all three of these people. Whatever and however that may be. We are NOT here to judge them, their learning curve, or experiences. We are here to love and help each other. By doing so, we become His servant, we become like Him.

Have a great week and see you soon.